22 Georgia Dinner Table Rules From The 1960s That Would Stump Today’s Kids
I was flicking through an old family recipe box the other day (mostly to avoid cooking, let’s be honest) when I stumbled upon a tattered note titled “Supper Etiquette: Keepin’ Up Appearances.” My eyes widened.
“No elbow wrestling for the last biscuit?” I muttered, picturing my nephew. It hit me: the rules governing a 1960s Georgia dinner table were a whole different ballgame.
Forget TikTok; these mandates would have today’s kids doing a double-take, probably asking if “table manners” was some kind of ancient board game. I swear, just two of these would make my own children spontaneously combust.
1. No Elbows On The Table
Sharp glances from parents shot across the table whenever arms drifted into forbidden territory. The rule was simple but strictly enforced: hands visible, elbows off.
Children quickly learned proper posture meant sitting up straight with forearms resting lightly at the table edge when not eating. Slouching earned quiet corrections or a gentle tap on the offending elbow.
Kids sprawled across couches with dinner trays or hunched over phones today would find this constraint bewildering. The physical discipline required to maintain proper table posture for an entire meal seems almost militaristic to the modern child.
2. Wait Until Everyone’s Served
Patience prevailed at Georgia dinner tables. Even with a steaming plate of fried chicken and collard greens right under your nose, you sat with hands folded until everyone received their portion.
The rule taught consideration for others and community over individual desires. Watching food cool while the last family member was served built character and restraint.
I remember my grandfather’s stern look when I once reached for a biscuit before my aunt had been served. That silent correction taught me more about respect than any lecture could have. Today’s kids, accustomed to grabbing snacks whenever hunger strikes, would find this delayed gratification puzzling.
3. Say Grace Before Touching A Fork
Prayer preceded every meal in 1960s Georgia homes. The family patriarch typically led grace while everyone bowed heads and clasped hands in reverent silence.
Some families recited traditional blessings passed through generations. Others offered personal thanks for the food, family, and day’s blessings.
The spiritual pause created a boundary between regular activities and mealtime, signaling the importance of gratitude. Modern children, who might dive straight into meals without acknowledgment of their source, would find the ritual unfamiliar-a moment of contemplation before consumption in contrast to today’s hurried eating.
4. Pass All Dishes To The Right
Clockwise circulation governed Georgia dinner tables with almost mathematical precision. Dishes moved like planets in orderly orbits, always to the right, never across the table.
Learning this choreography took practice. Children watched adults and mimicked their movements, absorbing the unwritten rules through observation.
My grandmother once stopped an entire meal when my cousin passed the cornbread to the left, causing momentary chaos in our well-ordered system. Everyone laughed, but the correction was clear. Such structured passing would mystify today’s kids who simply reach for what they want, unaware that dinner once followed predictable patterns like a well-rehearsed dance.
5. Salt And Pepper Travel As Inseparable Companions
Salt and pepper shakers maintained a sacred partnership on Georgia tables. Passing one without its mate was considered improper, like breaking up a happily married couple.
Children learned to grab both shakers with one hand, placing them near the recipient who would then continue their journey together. This seemingly arbitrary rule taught attention to detail and consideration.
The practice stemmed from practical courtesy—assuming someone wanting one seasoning might need the other. Today’s kids would question why these simple table items required such ceremonial handling when modern convenience prioritizes efficiency over formality.
6. Never Speak With Food In Your Mouth
Southern parents monitored mealtime conversation with eagle eyes. Attempting to speak mid-chew earned swift correction and possibly a reminder about proper ladies and gentlemen.
Children learned to time their contributions to conversations around their bites. This practice wasn’t merely about appearances but showed respect for fellow diners spared from unwanted food displays.
The rule required self-discipline and awareness many modern kids lack. In an age of multitasking and casual eating, the focused attention required to coordinate eating and speaking seems unnecessarily formal to contemporary children accustomed to chatting through meals without such constraints.
7. Ask Permission For Seconds
Helping yourself to more food showed poor breeding in 1960s Georgia. Children learned to wait for an offer or request permission before taking additional servings.
The ritual typically involved complimenting the cook before asking, “May I please have some more of your delicious mashed potatoes?” This exchange reinforced hierarchy and gratitude.
I still remember my mother’s mortification when I boldly reached for more chicken at my aunt’s house without asking. The lesson stuck with me forever. Today’s self-serve buffet mentality and casual approach to food sharing would make this formal request system seem unnecessarily complicated to modern children.
8. Men Stand When A Lady Enters
Chairs scraped across Georgia dining rooms whenever a female family member or guest approached the table. Boys as young as five learned to pop up from their seats when mother, sister, or any woman entered, remaining standing until she was seated.
Gendered courtesy reflected deeper social codes about protection and respect. Fathers corrected sons with a quick glance or throat clearing if they forgot this essential mark of a gentleman.
The practice created clear gender roles that modern families have largely abandoned. Contemporary children would find this choreographed standing and sitting bizarre, wondering why gender would determine who stands and who sits at a family meal.
9. Acknowledge Every “Bless You” With Thanks
Sneezing triggered an automatic social exchange at Georgia dinner tables. Someone nearby would offer a quick “Bless you,” and the sneezer was expected to respond with a prompt “Thank you.”
Failing to complete this verbal transaction was considered impolite. Parents would prompt forgetful children with raised eyebrows or a gentle reminder about proper acknowledgment.
The exchange reflected community care and recognition. Modern kids often receive “bless you” without feeling obligated to respond, treating it as background noise rather than a social interaction requiring completion. This small courtesy represented the interconnectedness valued in Southern society.
10. Hands In Lap, Napkin Too
Proper napkin placement was serious business in 1960s Georgia. Children learned to unfold their napkins halfway through and place them neatly across their laps, never tucked into collars or shirts.
Hands rested in laps when not actively eating, creating a composed appearance. The rule prevented fidgeting and maintained order at the table.
My uncle used to say idle hands at the table led to mischief, which explained why this rule was so strictly enforced in our family. Contemporary children, accustomed to holding phones under the table or constantly reaching for food, would struggle with this required stillness and formal napkin protocol.
11. No Reaching Across The Table
Long arms earned no privileges at proper Georgia tables. Stretching across platters to grab a roll demonstrated poor upbringing, regardless of how close the desired item might be.
Children learned the polite phrase, “Would you please pass the…” rather than extending arms across others’ space. This rule prevented accidental spills and maintained the visual harmony of the table setting.
The restriction taught children to use words rather than physical solutions. Today’s casual eating environments, where grabbing and reaching are commonplace, make this rule seem unnecessarily formal to modern kids who prioritize efficiency over ceremony in their dining habits.
12. Address Elders Formally At The Table
First names disappeared at Georgia dinner tables, replaced by formal titles. Children addressed adults as “Mr. James” or “Miss Sarah,” never by first names alone, regardless of familiarity.
This verbal formality created clear generational boundaries. Even teenage cousins might be addressed as “Miss” or “Mr.” by younger children, establishing a hierarchy of respect.
The practice wasn’t considered optional or situational but fundamental to proper upbringing. Modern kids, who often call parents’ friends by first names and address teachers casually, would find this linguistic formality strange and unnecessarily complicated, reflecting a social distance that contemporary families have largely eliminated.
13. Remain Seated Until Excused
Dinner table exits required formal permission in 1960s Georgia homes. Children sat through entire meals, regardless of boredom or completed plates, until an adult-usually the family matriarch-officially dismissed them.
The standard phrase “May I please be excused?” became second nature to Southern children. Parents might deny permission if important family discussions were ongoing or if someone was still eating.
I remember squirming through countless adult conversations after finishing my meal, waiting for the magic words that would release me from the table. Today’s kids, who often eat in shifts or leave when finished, would find this required patience and formal dismissal process bewilderingly restrictive.
14. Clean Your Plate Before Dessert
Georgia mothers transformed vegetables into gatekeepers to dessert. Children stared down lima beans and okra, knowing sweet treats remained hostage until plates were clean.
This rule wasn’t negotiable. Families believed wasting food showed disrespect to both the cook and those without enough to eat.
The practice taught children to try everything and developed appreciation for different foods. Modern kids, often catered to with separate meals or allowed to skip disliked items, would struggle with this all-or-nothing approach. Today’s focus on personal preference and concerns about forcing children to overeat have largely eliminated this once-standard rule.
15. Bodily Noises Strictly Forbidden
Accidental burps at Georgia dinner tables created moments of pin-drop silence. Even natural bodily functions required immediate verbal atonement: “Please excuse me” was the only acceptable response.
Children learned early that certain sounds had no place at proper tables. Giggling after such incidents only compounded the offense.
My brother once burped loudly during Sunday dinner with our preacher present. The mortified silence that followed taught him more about decorum than any lecture could have. Modern children, who might find bodily sounds amusing or unremarkable, would be surprised by the serious social consequences such noises once carried in polite Southern society.
16. Cut One Piece At A Time
Knife skills received scrutiny at Georgia tables. Children learned to cut just one bite-sized piece, place the knife down, switch the fork to the right hand, then eat that single piece.
This methodical approach prevented the barbaric sight of food pre-cut into tiny pieces all at once. The European-influenced technique distinguished refined diners from those with rustic manners.
The precision required genuine coordination and patience. Today’s kids, often eating with just forks or fingers for convenience, would find this elaborate cutting protocol unnecessarily fussy and time-consuming, representative of a culture that valued form alongside function in everyday activities.
17. Decline the Last Piece Once Before Accepting
Social choreography surrounded the final piece of cornbread or last slice of pie on Georgia tables. Proper etiquette required declining the first offer with, “No thank you, someone else might want it.”
Only after a second insistence could you accept without appearing greedy. This ritual dance of offering and refusing demonstrated consideration for others’ desires above your own.
Children watched adults perform this routine countless times before mastering it themselves. Contemporary kids would find this false reluctance confusing or even dishonest-why not simply state what you want? The practice reflected a culture valuing self-restraint and community consideration over individual satisfaction.
18. Taboo Topics: Money And Politics
Certain conversation topics were banished from proper Georgia dinner tables. Financial matters, political disagreements, and personal problems remained off-limits during meals.
Parents quickly redirected children who innocently mentioned someone’s salary or repeated political opinions overheard elsewhere. Dinner conversation focused on pleasant topics that included everyone.
This selective conversation created peaceful mealtimes but also avoided important discussions. My father would simply say, “Not at the table,” when controversial subjects arose, ending debate immediately.
19. Never Arrive Empty-Handed
Georgia children learned early that dinner invitations required reciprocation through small gifts. Families never arrived at another’s home without something in hand—pound cake, fresh vegetables, or flowers.
This practice demonstrated appreciation for hospitality and prevented the host from feeling their generosity was taken for granted. Children might be tasked with carrying the offering and presenting it properly.
The tradition created a continuous circle of giving and receiving. I remember my mother sending me to neighbors with jars of homemade jam as dinner invitation responses. Today’s kids, accustomed to casual drop-ins and restaurant meetups, would find this obligatory gift-giving unnecessarily formal.
20. Thank The Cook Explicitly
Gratitude concluded every Georgia meal with formal acknowledgment. Children learned to make direct eye contact with whoever prepared the food and offer specific compliments beyond a simple “thanks.”
Phrases like “The roast was delicious, thank you for preparing it” showed proper appreciation. Parents prompted forgetful children with “What do you say to your grandmother?” ensuring the lesson stuck.
This verbal recognition honored the work behind the meal. Modern kids might mumble thanks while looking at screens or exit without acknowledgment, missing the meaningful connection this tradition created between those who prepared food and those who enjoyed it. The practice underscored that meals were acts of service deserving recognition.
21. Don’t Clear Plates Without Permission
Clearing Georgia dinner tables followed strict protocols. Children eager to help might receive surprising corrections when jumping up to remove dishes before the designated time.
The hostess or mother controlled when clearing began. Premature plate removal implied rushing guests or suggesting they had eaten enough.
My grandmother once gently pushed my hands away from the dishes, whispering, “Wait until everyone’s finished talking.” I learned meal cleanup had its proper moment. Today’s efficiency-minded kids would be confused by this seemingly arbitrary timing rule that prioritized social rhythm over practical cleanup.
22. Music Requires Lowered Voices
Background music at Georgia dinners came with voice-volume adjustments. Families understood that if radio or phonograph played softly, conversation should remain quieter to avoid competing sounds.
Balanced appreciation created harmony between music and human connection. Children learned to modulate their excitement when sharing stories during musical accompaniment.
The rule demonstrated respect for both art forms-music and conversation. Contemporary kids, accustomed to shouting over television programs or wearing headphones at the table, would find this careful sound balancing unnecessarily complicated. The practice reflected a time when both music and mealtime conversation were considered valuable experiences worthy of proper attention.